I still have not taught our team HOW TO SHARE CHRIST VERBALLY. But we have encouraged them to have 2 touches/dinners a month with their neighbors/co-workers that they do not know [or better said, don't do life together with]. We live in a “drive in your garage and shut it quick and maybe give a quick wave” kind of place. [Don't hate...in my rural community I came from, no one knew their neighbors either, really.]

So last night we had 7 new families show up in our house for a CHRISTMAS OPEN HOUSE. A quick simple printed invite asking people to join us from 6.30-8.30 and get a chance to hang out with their neighbors. Sound hard? It wasn’t.

$50 cookie/brownie/etc. platter from the NEWLY OPENED bakery in our neighborhood, [come on...you have to create many personal opportunities. yes, Wal-Mart would have been $30, but we set out the new bakeries business cards and made another touch...], hot cider, hot chocolate and punch. Put on some Christmas music and we were on. Nothing fancy, nothing that took hours and hours to plan and prep. We put out the invites a day ahead [yep...that's it, so YOU still have time before Christmas].

You would have thought that we had given each of them $1,000 each. They didn’t know what to do, they were so shocked and thankful that we would open up our house. [WE do this about once a quarter, sometimes a cook-out, sometimes very simple like this]. What has happened where you can do something so simple and get rave reviews?

We just don’t take time anymore. Our family included. That’s why the goal of our church is not to “get people to come to our cool service [alone...we want people to come and we want them inviting and engaging], but to build real, lasting friendships that will intersect with our lives. Most of our neighbors had never even met [NOTE: they all go to the same LDS ward every single Sunday at the same time for 3 hours...].

Your next opportunities: New Year’s Eve/Day open house, college football bowl parties, Super Bowl, UFC pay-per-view for the men, my wife hosted a sweets and chick-flick event [both were a hit for us].

It’s not hard.

My challenge to MYSELF is to not be a career man with some Christian incarnation thrown in [it's so easy when you are a type-A, driven, CEO kind of church-planter.] But to be a radical follower of Christ, with my life, hobbies, goals and career thrown in. It’s so easy to get sucked into the selfish lifestyle that it is all about me, my family, my kids, my career, my friends, my goal, my church people.

It’s not hard. But dang it’s hard.

When I had a heart cath at age 32 and the gall bladder removal, and the stomach issues, and the panic attacks…enough was enough. When I kissed my 3 babies goodbye and headed off for the heart cath lab, it was a wake up call. I didn’t want to die young by God’s grace [yes, I believe in the sovereignty of God, but I don't believe in helping to work it out faster.] I was simply a young leader who didn’t have any coaching and not enough people around me to help me figure this out.

1 of my staff who is 15+ years my senior suggested it was my pace. Of course, I blew him off like most pastors and leaders because it’s really the attack of Satan and a real physical condition. [Not saying that this is not the case at times].

I just could not disconnect. Running 1000 MPH, even with proper boundaries can still kill you. When the Dr’s. started suggesting stress, books started suggesting it, leaders started talking about it…I finally listened.

I HAVE to disconnect after a normal 9-10 hour work day. Some people exercise in the morning. I exercise in the afternoon and I train HARD. I also train with a GOAL in mind. As a type-A leader, you must have a goal if you are going to train HARD. [Some pastors and leaders have turned to destructive ways to disconnect...I don't need to talk about that, you see it all the time in the church world.]

When I get around to training for the Ironman Race that is one day my ultimate goal, I will have to train twice a day, but for now, the afternoon slot is my disconnect between “WORK” and “HOME”. This is especially critical because I work out of my home.

Besides the disconnect, it gives me the needed energy boost to hang with my family in the evening and allows me to truly rest well. I watch very hard “the quick check of the e-mail or before I know it, I start working again [outside of casual web surfing like reading up on my pathetic Bengals team or a facebook peek]. I also shut the computer usually a few HOURS before I need to go to bed, and I enjoy the evening and begin decompressing.

YOU ARE IN CONTROL OF YOUR LIFE. No one but YOU can make time to do what YOU need to do in your schedule.

Rick Warren has a mantra I follow:

Divert Daily // Withdraw Weekly // Abandon Annually.

Physical and Spiritual training in our life will help us make it in the long haul.

“For physical training is of some value, but godliness has value for all things, holding promise for both the present life and the life to come.” 1 Timothy 4.8

What do you do to disconnect in your life?

No joke. If you are a type A, driven, consumed, passionate leader, if you do not have a true outlet you will die. Your marriage, your family, your ministry, your physical body.

I was 32 when my heart was cathed. And millions of tests later, yes: I had physical damage, but it was brought on by stress. Period. Stress will kill you. Have a mild heart issue, no gall bladder, and digestion issues. All stress-related more than likely.

AND YES!!!!! I had date night, I had family time, I had an assistant, I worked normal work hours and very few nights out, but I had NOTHING to relieve the stress from the 1000 MPH days and weekends [Saturday and Sunday services in multiple campuses].

Finally figured out that I needed not only a weekly and yearly finish line, but a DAILY finish line. Do you have yours?

I now work from 6:30/7:30am to no later than 4:00/5:00pm and then I hit the gym. Currently running my first marathon tomorrow in Las Vegas, and will be training for the Ironman Triathlon [possibly] next fall.

From 4:30-6:00 it is my ritual to either drop my son off at swimming or if my wife does, to head out on my own and instead of sitting there working, dreaming, blogging, e-mailing or reading [NOT A SOURCE OF STRESS RELIEF!] …I hit it hard.

Shut your computer off! I sometimes shut off the internet on my Blackberry so I can’t see e-mail in the evenings, especially when I go to plug it in just before bed and see 10 e-mails awaiting me! I close my eyes, don’t look and shut it off.

For 60-120 minutes a day [4-6 days a week], and for marathon/Triathlon training…hit it for up to 3 hours straight on a weekend [either a tri brick or up to a 20 mile run]. So I don’t miss any family time usually as I walk in the door when my son is done with swimming, which I would have been at anyway…and my life and health have never been better.

Will talk about the WHY later next week. [1 Timothy 4]

WHAT DO YOU DO TO TRULY DISCONNECT EVERY DAY?